Political Ponerology - A Must Read!

The presence or absence of concience is a deep human division, arguably more significant than intelligence, race or even gender.

-Laura Knight-Jadczyk Editor of Political Ponerology by Andrew M. Lobaczewski

Game Theory, Evolution and Pathologicals

Game Theory article on lovefraud.com

Psychopathy as evolutionary niche pdf article

The sociobiology of sociopathy article.

Haiku sent by a Fellow Traveler

My storehouse having burnt down, nothing obscures my view of the bright moon.

-Japanese Haiku author unknown

Resistance is Futile

This retreat has solidified all of what I’ve come to know to be true about recovering from a pathological relationship. While differing in specifics for each fellow traveler the process shares some essential qualities. One of these is the absolute need to purge the poison of evil we’ve consumed during our victimization. The nausea that our awakening brings causes us to vomit all of the gory details of what our respective pathologicals did to us. * Luckily I had O to help me through my purging. She had a vested interest in my healing process since we share the same psychopath. Most of us don’t have that luxury or even the luxury of having someone around who understands at all. Those of us who find avenues (though I’m not sure there are any others) like the retreat I’m attending find, perhaps for the first time, other survivors and an opportunity to share our stories and purge, purge, purge. **

For the past year I’ve been politely purging on this blog and rudely vomiting on my friends and family to the point of alienating them. I think I’m almost done with that part of my healing process, and am very glad. It feels remarkably like the sensation of relief one feels after actually physically vomiting as the nausea subsides and you pray that was the last time for a while.

Of the many insights I’ve gained during the course of this retreat there is one in particular I think will serve me the most afterward. That is that no matter what specific things our specific pathological did to us (and they are remarkably the same) the end result is the same. Inevitable harm by an incurable psychopath. Focusing on the minutia of what happened keeps alive the illusion that we can somehow figure out a way to avoid evil. But we can’t. And it is that fact… that evil exists, that it has always existed and that it will continue to exist until the end of the world… that each of us is resisting with our entire being.

I have spent my entire life struggling to eliminate “evil” in some form. Whether the evil of capitalists, war, misogyny, racism or whatever; I believed that human beings are ALL inherently good and can, therefore figure out a way to live in peace. This was the fundamental belief that I have lost. For other fellow travelers it is a fundamental shift in how they view God or whatever belief system they have in place. What is common to all these belief systems is a stubborn refusal to accept that evil exists, has always existed and will always exist until the end of the world and that there is absolutely NOTHING we can do to eliminate it. Resisting the acceptance of this reality is futile. The misalignment I feel is the final vestiges of the cognitive dissonance that defines a relationship with a pathological. We as normal people have been trying to reconcile being with resident evil while denying its existence. Continuing to try to understand why a pathological did this to me is an attempt to find a solution where there is none. It did it because that's what psychopaths do and there is NO changing that.

As a philosopher I have studied these questions in great depth, but have struggled tooth and nail to resist the seemingly pessimistic view that human beings are not redeemable as a species. My whole cloth rejection of Existentialism and Post Modernism is the most obvious example of this resistance. My guess is that if any of my philosophy professors are reading this they are probably smiling. I hope one day to smile about it too, but I'm feeling pretty pessimistic at the moment.

Love and hugs, Laura

*There are lots or reasons why and how this happens, e.g. PTSD symptoms, brain chemistry, etc. I highly recommend reading Women Who Love Psychopaths: Inside the Relationships of Inevitable Harm by Sandra Brown.

**Thank you Sandra Brown and the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction, for providing this safe space.

It Won with a 49

I am currently attending a retreat for survivors of a pathological relationship given by Sandra Brown entitled Healing the Aftermath of Pathological Love Relationships. Sandra is a cutting edge leader working on helping survivors of psychopathic love relationships. She is the author of several books including, Women Who Love Psychopaths - Inside Relationships of Inevitable Harm. Attending this workshop is a gift I wish all survivors could receive. Today was the first day of the five day retreat. Although I was going to wait until after the entire event was over to blog about it I decided to write this post in advance while it's still fresh in my mind. I'm emotionally drained and very tired, so I don't plan on editing this. My apologies for typos or lack of clarity in this post....

Robert Hare is well known in the field of psychology as the leading expert on psychopathy who developed the first standardized test for psychopathy. His work has been primarily with convicted criminals, but the test has proven to be accurate in measuring psychopaths who remain under the legal radar. His tests include a psychopathy checklist test for those involved with psychopaths. This makes perfect sense since accurately testing psychopaths themselves is virtually impossible since part of psychopathy is pathological lying.

From Wickipedia:

PCL-R Model of psychopathy

The PCL-R is a clinical rating scale (rated by a psychologist or other professional) of 20 items. Each of the items in the PCL-R is scored on a three-point scale according to specific criteria through file information and a semi-structured interview. A value of 0 is assigned if the item does not apply, 1 if it applies somewhat, and 2 if it fully applies. In addition to lifestyle and criminal behavior the checklist assesses glib and superficial charm, grandiosity, need for stimulation, pathological lying, conning and manipulating, lack of remorse, callousness, poor behavioral controls, impulsivity, irresponsibility, failure to accept responsibility for one's own actions and so forth. The scores are used to predict risk for criminal re-offence and probability of rehabilitation.

The current edition of the PCL-R officially lists four factors (1.a, 1.b, 2.a, and 2.b), which summarize the 20 assessed areas via factor analysis. The previous edition of the PCL-R^[4] listed two factors. Factor 1 is labelled "selfish, callous and remorseless use of others". Factor 2 is labelled as "chronically unstable, antisocial and socially deviant lifestyle". There is a high risk of recidivism and currently small likelihood of rehabilitation for those who are labelled as having "psychopathy" on the basis of the PCL-R ratings in the manual for the test, although treatment research is ongoing.

PCL-R Factors 1a and 1b are correlated with narcissistic personality disorder and histrionic personality disorder. It is associated with extroversion and positive affect. Factor 1, the so-called core personality traits of psychopathy, may even be beneficial for the psychopath (in terms of nondeviant social functioning).

PCL-R Factor 2a and 2b are particularly strongly correlated to antisocial personality disorder and criminality and is associated with reactive anger, criminality, and impulsive violence. The target group for the PCL-R is convicted criminals. The quality of ratings may depend on how much background information is available and whether the person rated is honest and forthright.

I have known about this test for some time, but have (subconsciously) avoided taking it. Last night when Sandra announced we would be taking it, my first reaction was to fear that It would rate below the cut off level for psychopathy. This is a normal reaction given the nature of pathological abuse and victims' proclivity toward minimizing their abusers behavior and even though I am aware of that reality still wondered how It would "measure up."

After listening to the introduction stories of the four fellow travelers who are also retreating I was fairly sure It would fall below the men that these women were describing. I decided that I would approach the test as openly and objectively as I could, not awarding It any leniency based on the "good" times nor condemning it unfairly. After all, I really want to know what the hell happened to me and this is a useful tool.

Surprising to me -- but not to anyone else I know -- It not only tested fairly high on scale, but was higher than my fellow traveler's pathologicals with a 49 out of 60 (30 being the cut-off.)

This knowledge is both validating and unsettling. It seems that even with all of the research I've done and distance I've gained I am still minimizing It's pathology and what happened to me. This test validated my experience in a very tangible way. But it also made me even more grateful than ever that I was able to escape as quickly as I did. This man IS dangerous. VERY dangerous. For whatever reasons it may not be acting out now, but it is capable of so much more than even the unspeakable damage it has already done to those around It.

One thing is a given, It is, by definition, incapable of changing or even improving. It will continue to damage and destroy all who come in close contact with it. Knowing that someone is a psychopath isn't enough. Case in point - Hare, like other mental health professionals, was consistently taken in by his inmate patients knowing full well who he was dealing with. No one is immune... the only real safety is in NO contact. I pray for the safety of all those who come in contact with It.

Love and hugs, Laura